Work of Art!

Everyday is like a blank canvas
You know you can paint it anyway you want it
You can draw a black cloud
You can make the sun shine
Coloring a rainbow
or use black and white

– Demi Lovato, Work of Art

In this post I am going to referrence a past post it might get confusing at times but it will all tie together in the end. I went public about my attempt to end my life almost a year ago in-front of a group of middle schoolers, and eight months later I made it known to the world. I entitled the post “Skyscraper”, mainly because thats the first song that I heard after my attempt.  Here is a link to that post as a refresher of that event Skyscraper.

When I first started my recovery process I wanted to have more songs to motivate me.  I guess it was because at the time I felt that music was my outlet.  In fact music is still my outlet to this day.  Another song that the singer of Skyscraper sang was a song entitled “Work of Art”.  In this post I am going to do something a little familiar to some of my previous posts.  There will be a few song lyrics and following those lyrics I will write my interpretations and how this song helped motivate me to Stay Strong and to become a Warrior.

Everyday is like a blank canvas
You know you can paint it anyway you want it

Every day that I woke up I knew that it was another day that I lived through and I was stronger because of it.  I started to become aware of the fact this this was my life not theirs, and I am in control of it.  I could mope more and more and have myself be an easy target as always or I could prove them wrong.  So I painted it the way I wanted to.

You can draw a black cloud
You can make the sun shine
Coloring a rainbow
or use black and white

Instead of drawing more black clouds to my storm, I turned my pencil around and used the eraser for its purpose. I made the black clouds vanish and made the sun shine on me.  There were times that were black and white, but that was when it came to standing up to those that were bullying me.  A rainbow was sketched  after every confrontation.

Open up your eyes and your imagination

On my “sketchpad” (metaphor for the work of art), I started to draw myself with armor that made me stronger.  A piece was added to my armor day after day as I became stronger.

Come on let’s write a song
A little poetry
Take a photograph
Let’s make some memories

Instead of me writing songs or poetry, I decided to share my story in a different way.  In a way that came easy to me and that was in my writing. I know that I am sharing parts of my life that will be memories in those that I share these events to them.  Memories that will help others, kids just like me, kids who need help, and someone to talk to, or to a person that needs a reminder that they are not alone.

You can make it anything
That you want it to be
If you follow your heart
Life is a work of art

I took control over my life and I made it mine to live, it was not meant for others to destroy it.  I followed my heart a lot though the process.  When I write these posts I let my heart do the speaking and my fingers do the typing.  I am making my own work of art for the world to see and feel.

Oh every night is like looking at a dark screen
You’re never too young or too old to dream
You can make a fantasy into a reality
‘Cause you’re creating your own masterpiece

Before I decided to take back my life, I would lay in bed at night and cry myself to sleep.  I would cry because I wanted the bullying to stop.  I would cry because I wanted to fix what others said was wrong with me.  I would cry because I didn’t even know how to fix what was wrong with me yet alone I didn’t even know what was wrong with me. I made that fantasy of me facing me so called demons into a reality and it turns out that the only thing that was wrong with me was that I listened to what others said about me.  All I really needed to do was let my heart take control over my life and the possibilities would become endless.

Turn a simple thought into a philosophy
Turn a star into a galaxy
Make a little noise into a symphony
You’re creating a masterpiece

I have turned many thoughts into philosophies since I started this journey.  I made a little noise into an explosive bang for the whole world to hear.  The beauty of my masterpiece is that it is not finished and it never will be because my life is a work of art.  Everyday that I wake up is a blank canvas for something new to be painted on it.

Come on let’s write a song
A little poetry
Take a photograph
Let’s make some memories
You can make it anything
That you want it to be
If you follow your heart
Life is a work of art

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