“To me, I don`t think it does anybody any good to just hide something or cover it up or lie or whatever. I think that`s what being a role model is all about. It`s not about being perfect. It`s about speaking about your issues and inspiring others to get help.” – Demi Lovato
When I really take the time to reflect on the work that I have completed in the past few months, a lot of feelings come to me. I feel scared, happy, excited, sad, strong, courageous, but most of all I feel inspirational.
Scared because I was entering into unknown territory when I became public about my story. I was scared because I did not know what type of feedback I would receive, yet alone any feedback at all. I was scared because I had no idea how well this would even work for me. I was really scared when it came to the thought that I might just be wasting my time writing all of these posts and not have one soul even skim over them.
Happy because when I finally got my story out in the open, the amount of support was overwhelming. I was happy because I knew that I was making a difference, not a big difference, but a difference.
Excited because once I started receiving support I was encouraged to write more and more.
Sad because of all the emotion that I poured into some posts, and how personal I made them. I admit it, there were a few posts that I cried while writing them. That`s how I know when it will be good, when my emotions do most of the writing.
I felt strong and courageous when a viewer responds to one of my posts and say that they went through the same experiences as me. I felt the biggest amount of courage when I shared the story about how I almost ended it all (see Skyscraper), and someone told me that they had thoughts of ending their life in the past and that they were proud of me and how courageous I was for putting my story out there.
Inspirational because of all the feedback I receive from my posts. I mentioned earlier about it might only be one person reached, to me that`s not a big difference, but to the person that the difference was made it was a life changer. When I was being bullied, I had no body to look up to, I had no role model. Which is why it is still hard for me to believe that today I am a role model not just to others but to myself as well.
Goal: Don`t be surprised when someone looks up to you. Embrace that role of a role model and accept mistakes when you make them. Your so called flaws are probably what led you to be a role model in the first place.